One of my favorite search results was a Yelp feed on "Things You Should Have Been Told Before You Moved to NYC." Although most of the posts are negative, scary or down right revolting, I also found them to be humorous and am a little grateful for the warning.
I pulled together the top 55 tips/warnings. You can read the rest of the post here.
2. That isn't mud on your shoe. Ever.
3. NYC apartments are very dry in the winter. Like CRAZY dry. I keep three humidifiers running in mine all winter
4. Everything is under construction always
5. Cabs -- when the number on top is lit up - it's empty, when it's not - someone is in there, and when the whole thing is on - it's off duty
6. When a subway car is significantly emptier during rush hour than all the others, it's for one of two reasons: there is a smelly bum stinking up the place, or the AC is broken
7. People will molest you if you fall asleep on the train - and sometimes even if you don't fall asleep
8. The gutters have a slight green slime known as garbage juice. It's from stores and restaurants putting their trashbags on the curbs late at night (there are no back alleys for trash pickup).
9. RATS: there are lots of them - they might be in your new apartment
10. BEDBUGS are a problem - if you get them you'll be screwed!
11. The subway lines are repaired on the weekend, so there are often long delays and sometimes whole lines are shut down (midnight to 5 am)
12. You can know what part of the corner you are standing on and what direction you exit the subway from, if you pay attention to the SW-NW-SE-NE directional signs near the exits.
13. The even numbered streets go east, the odd numbered ones go west.
14. Avenue blocks are longer than street blocks.
15. Don't feel guilty about totally ignoring the people trying to shove a leaflet into your hand as you pass them on the sidewalk.
16. That there are plenty of parks and places to exercise and bike and run outside. That though manhattan is an island, it's large enough that you won't notice and won't feel claustrophobic.
17. you will think it's totally normal to make plans to meet someone somewhere at 1 am, "just when it's starting to get a little busy"
18. you will think it's totally normally to have to visit your storage locker every two weeks to get that outfit you stored there, or the other vacuum cleaner, or your good hiking shoes
19. Don't expect the same prices for groceries as you'd find outside of the city... $10 for a baby watermelon!?!? Are you kidding me!?
20. you will see something very very terrible and sad - possibly about once a week (daily?) - which will shake you
21. do NOT economize on rent. you're not smart. you will get mugged. i personally know 3 people who were mugged. now they pay 200-300 dollars more
22. Try to be early rather than "on time" - there WILL be a problem with the trains.
23. People you don't want to talk to you won't if you don't look at them.
24. Bring something to read or look at while you're on the train.
25. Let the people off the train before you go running inside.
26. Do NOT wear flip flops beach shoes in the city far from home base. it WILL rain, you will slip on the slippery sidewalks, your feet will be NASTY when you get home. the rain is relaxing, therapeutic in other cities. in nyc it's disgusting.
27. There are really only two places where you can get a full meal (like with a drink, etc.) for under $10: on the street and in Chinatown (exceptions include Mamouns and Grey's Papaya).
28. People here care more about how you look in your clothes than out of them (as opposed to L.A. or Miami). Dress to impress, baby!
29. Stand on the right, MOVE on the left
30. You pay for what neighborhood you live in, not what kind of apartment you live in.
34. All of the awesome free events, movies in the park, concerts in the park, etc...
35. Getting used to "To stay." versus "For here" at a fast food joint. Makes sense.
36. DO NOT TURN RIGHT ON RED. For that matter, do not bring your car. All you'll need is a metrocard and maybe a bicycle.
37. If it's less than two subways stops, you should walk.
38. Paying the premium to live in a neighborhood where you feel safe at any time of the day/night is unbelievably worth it.
39. If you wear stilettos to the Meatpacking District, prepare to get laughed at as you teeter around in the cobblestone streets. You'll get laughed at by chicks like me who wore flats.
40. Get the most out of your neighborhood. Try every restaurant and bar, even if you end up splurging a bit, because you never know when you'll find a new favorite, or when that place you've always wanted to go to will lose its lease.
41. If you're moving to NY soon, start reading Gothamist, Curbed, Eater, and the NYMag blogs NOW, even though you will at first have no idea what they are talking about. Once you get here, you'll start finding niches of local blogs to diversify your office procrastination time that fit your interests/neighborhood
42. Have a good idea of how to get where you're going when you hop in a cab. They will fuck you.
43. Nothing in life is ever free. Craiglist is full of scammers. Expect to find brokers posting on the no-broker, no fee part of teh apartment site
44. Be assertive (not bitchy, just assertive) and you will usually get better service at the crowded deli for lunch.
45. You're not the smartest, funniest, prettiest, coolest, or greatest one here - that's what motivates you.
46. If you're a good-looking, decently-dressed guy (business casual counts) who works out, you'll get hit on by men and you'll just have to deal with it.
47. New York City is the only city where, when it rains, it makes it's own gravy.
48. No one takes credit cards and 2 - there are no public bathrooms anywhere
49. You can report Cabbies for not stopping
50. IT IS ILLEGAL FOR CABS TO NOT ACCEPT C.C. if they have the machine!!!!! You can refuse to pay and leave the cab if they do not accept it - tell a cop and they will get a ticket.
51. After living in the city for over a year you will want kill every person you hear say, "the big apple" :)
52. If you are waiting for a train late night or on weekends, you'll most likely get screwed.
53. It takes at least 20 mins to get anywhere in the city. Even if you live right around the corner from your destination, you are still at least 20 mins away.
54. Develop a longer patience because there are tourists, crazy traffic, crammed train, and dirty floors - but that's almost every other city in the world.
55. Realize that something horrendous and reprehensible happens in New York everyday. You have to learn to accept everything and that you can't change everything. Don't wallow in your disappointment - it just gets everyone else down.
And, one post with positives that makes me hopeful:
Street fairs and green markets - lovely.
Summer, Fall, Spring and Winter in Central Park - lovely.
There's a heart beat to the City.
Stop on the sidewalk, in a historical part of the city, look around and it's easy to imagine the generations that lived here prior.
Free events each week.
I've never felt threatened.
This city will humble you but make you stronger as well.
Feel free to comment with your own insightful advice.
No comments:
Post a Comment